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Breaking Free from Empty Promises

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Education & Career

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
- Mark Twain

I do not choose you. That you therefore reject me with aggression and lack of understanding, is a symptom of what I've been confronting you with. I will decide it myself. How I spend the hours of my life, with whom, and how I treat my own body. Freedom is the capacity to refuse being lived by others' imposed rules. I know your type. I may be young and appear considerably younger, my self-worth has developed dignifiedly through the lows of my life experiences. When you look at me, you only do so through the eyes of your interests and logic. Without empathy, humbleness, and necessary restraint, which a creature requires when trying to understand another person. Honestly, I know it is not self-evident being capable of simply doing this. But do not pretend then it is more fair and better to torpedo assumptions. Unknown means for you unloved... The unfamiliar is loved by me, where sincerity knocks on the doors of divinity.

You don’t have to understand it. I don’t need you. That insecure, needy, lonely girl is no more. That makes you so angry, to which you have absolutely no right. You don’t have a say in my dreams, my thoughts, and the lifelong path of their realisation. It is my life, my breath and dust, my heart and soul. I am fortunate to be surrounded by people who love me. For who I am. It would bring them grief if I complied with your wishes that would make me all that I do not want to be. Because they know the person who loves them. My love is powerful, it has no status.

I do not have to be the highly educated woman who works for more than forty hours per week, towards a prestigious position, who delays or cancels having children, who sees her partner merely as the other sex or as a side issue. I am neither the domestic woman who considers marriage and a family as ultimate. Nor the one who raises shopping, appearance, and approval from others, as her main activity.

It doesn’t have to anyway.

There is more between heaven and earth than the choices you present me with. I am not going to work my butt off for you. I do not need your approval. And neither your favours. I will do it myself and my definition of a successful life is different from and unworldly to you. For me, a lover is my buddy and my best friend. Children are not a logical consequence from my biology, but neither the end of my autonomy. A social hallmark on my work with a boastful amount of money is not enough for me. I must not daily wish I were somewhere else, because I could not be myself. Why in god’s name would I want any different? What is freedom? I prefer to work less and shop, do sports, and play a bit more for and with the people, myself, and my own body whom I love...than some more for someone else who would never value my inner strength as a professional quality!

I leave you behind now. A firm closure of the expectations projected on me over the that part of my schooling that claimed being the one and only to possess the truth about how to become a wise, progressive, and valuable being... False Feminism and Estranged Science... Life wisdom is not learnt from the books, but by a listening heart. Although you often argued you were better than the 'less intelligent and emancipated' rest, I still want to thank you for the beautiful and educational moments we have shared, and that you have given me the peace to let go of you. Farewell. I choose me. However it may be after a rocky and curvy journey... I believe that in this way life deserves again what it needs from me. To give what I finally grant myself: not to be something graded, but some One loved.


Success is more attitude than aptitude.

Succes is meer houding dan geschikt zijn.